The Questioning Heart

"Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, 'I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!'"

~ Mark 9:24

I've been reading through the book of Mark lately.  It is regarded as the earliest of the Gospels and seems to have provided much of the text that Matthew and Luke borrowed from as well.  All this aside, the stories are what really matter - and that's what I've been put in awe by lately.

Mark 9 tells the story of a boy possessed with a demon.  This, however, is not your ordinary, run of the mill devil.  It's an immensely powerful and profoundly evil entity that has gained complete control over the child's body and senses. It's during one of the child's fits of convulsions that Jesus walks onto the scene.

By far, the most profound bit of this story is not the healing that Jesus performs himself, but the story of the faith possessed by the boy's father.  We learn through the father's words to Jesus that he has taken care of his son for many long years.  In fact, the boy has been demon-possessed since birth.  Anyone who has dealt with a chronic illness in their own bodies or in within their close family knows just how taxing and downtrodding such a situation can be.  Often, it can drag you to the depths of despair and hold you there.  We see from the few words we're given from his mouth that the father's faith in God has been shaken by this constant struggle.

To me, the crescendo of this story occurs in verses 23 and 24.  In verse 23, Jesus tells the father that it's not a question of if his son can be healed; rather, it comes down to whether the father believes and has the faith to make it happen - as faith can "move mountains", as Christ says elsewhere.  The father's response to this struck a deep nerve to me.  Truly, it is one of the most life changing verse I've read in the scriptures to date.  The father says in verse 24: "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!".  That's an amazingly deep idea.

What is the father saying?  When he states "I do believe", he is admitting to Christ that he has always believed in God - he has never once doubted His existence or power.  He doesn't stop with that, though.  He goes on to confess that He has doubts, which cause him to not believe in some aspects of His walk with God.  He has lost some faith in God's ability to follow through, because of the long turmoil he has suffered with his son.

For me, this idea parallels my struggles during the past year or so.  I have never ceased to believe that God exists.  I have, however, been fraught with questions concerning the doctrine of the church, the accuracy of some of scripture, and the beliefs many people in the church have about God.  I will admit that I still am questioning - which, to a certain extent is a good thing.  It also puts a stumbling block in my walk with Christ, though, which is never healthy.

Jesus' response to the father's statement provides a solution.  After hearing the father's words, He rises and heals the child.  It's that simple. Our lesson?  It's not wrong to have questions.  It's not a sin to wonder if everything you've heard all your life is the truth. In all our questioning, though, we must believe that Christ can help us overcome our unbelief.  It's this act of humble admission that we're weak and failing that touched Jesus' heart and resulted in the casting out of the child's demon.  Practicing this same act in our daily struggles of faith will result in the exorcism of our doubt.

Homophobic Christians

The title got your attention didn't it?  Using extreme terms usually does.  Which leads to my point. We live in an age of extremes.  There's extremists, extreme sports, extreme liberals, and extreme conservatives.  It's so "extreme" that it is overwhelming at times.  Sadly, Christianity is often a part of this trend. How? I'm glad you asked.  Be prepared for a long-winded answer.

People with a cause
Our journey into the paradoxical extremes of modern Christianity starts with the most obvious - and most often media-covered - group of "radical conservatives".  This group ranges from people who condemn gays and lesbians to individuals who murder abortion practitioners in cold blood.  Obviously, the most common of these people are the former - the people who have a "cause".

Presently, the cause that is dominant among this group is known in the media as "homophobia" or "gay bashing".  This topic will be the main theme of our discussion. While Christians may scoff at being attributed these labels, they often never consider why they are being thrown at them.  Being called these names should actually reveal something to us: that we're not approaching the homosexual issue in the proper manner.  Obviously, we can't please everyone as sin clouds people's minds; but perhaps we can be a little more Christ-like in our calling out of this type of sin.

How Christ can make you cringe
Christ wasn't a rabble-rouser, as so many "homophobic Christians" are.  Rather, he was accepting of everyone.  Let's stop and think about this.  Saying that Christ was accepting of all individuals - regardless of their lifestyle - is enough to make most Christians cringe. Why? Because it means that we can no longer attribute our intolerant feelings towards certain groups to the attitude of Christ.  This puts many of us in an uncomfortable position. When faced with the fact that our own prejudices aren't the real answer to the question "WWJD?", it means that we need to change more than the homosexuals do.  Remember, Christ said that we need to make sure we're on par with scripture before we point out the sin in others.

First and foremost , we need to be accepting of all people. This, however, brings us dangerously close to the other extreme of modern Christianity: the current trend to accept both people and their sin. This idea not fit the mold of a Christian that Jesus set either.  All we have to do is look in scripture. In every example we have of Christ encountering sinners, he is incredibly clear that he love the person, but he always points out their sin.  How he does this varies, but we consistently get the impression that he does it in a manner that does not condemn the individual, but their sin.

Many modern churches make the second mistake that I described above.  They never get to the point of using God's Word to convict people of their sin.  Some even go so far as to condoning it.  This is a very dangerous line to cross, as Christ did not do this either.  A great example of Christ's attitude in this area is his experience with a woman that religious leaders of his day caught in the "very act" of adultery.  In other words, the woman was found in bed with a man other than her husband.  In an attempt make him stumble in his ethical considerations, the religious leaders brought the woman before Christ and asked him what they should do.  What Christ did was astonishing, and something that we should pay careful attention to.  First, he told the hypocritical teachers that whoever among them had no sin in their lives could provide the first action of judgement.  This caused the leaders - rather than Jesus - to stumble on their words.  As a result, they withdrew and skulked off.  What Jesus did next should be our example.  He had already proven that he was not going to judge - but accept - her.  After this, he told her to "Go, and sin no more".  That's the key for us to remember.

Christ was a bipartisan
Using these two principles that Christ exemplified to us, we can be rid of the extremes of radical conservatism and politically correct liberalism.  Christ's method was exactly in the middle.  He spit in the face of legalism when he accepted the woman as an individual that was not only important to God, but important to him.  He then broke the sugar coating of liberal Christianity by calling out the woman's sin in love.

When we set Christ's method of evangelism and the two paradoxical methods of the conservative and liberal Christians side by side, we see a staggering difference.  Neither of the modern views match up with Christ's.  Why? Because Christ was a bipartisan.  He knew that extremism never changes anyone.  It ruins your ministry, image, and influence.  By following the path of extremism you either look like a bigot or a pushover.  You'll never see souls saved, and you'll hinder the Kingdom of God on earth.

Have you heard the one about a lesbian walking into a church?
Knowing all of this, what should Christians do when a homosexual walks into their church? You simply accept them. You should even go a step further: love them. That simple act will seem radical to them, after hearing the hatred and dogmaticism from the rest of the Christian community. 

Next, you preach the Bible.  You follow Christ's example in calling out their sin in love.  You stick to your doctrinal guns while at the same time holstering your personal views.

Refrain from extremism.  Pursue love.  Be stern.

Simply put: you act like a homochristian.

Who I Am

A man can no more diminish God’s glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word ‘darkness’ on the walls of his cell. ~ C.S. Lewis

I've been seeing this quote (which I've posted on here before) popping up everywhere.  I didn't think it was coincidence, as it really speaks to me in a unique way.

There is the obvious meaning of the quote, which refers to atheists.  But there's something else there, too. As Christians, we often live as practical atheists.  While we believe that God exists, we live like he doesn't. This practical atheism really is at the root of all sins.  If we really had a conception of God literally watching us every moment of every day, we would behave much, much differently.  Practical atheism is a very dangerous concept, because acting it out means that we miss so much of God's presence in our lives.

I struggle with this.  There are times I want God there, and times I don't.  The truth is we can't have one or the other.  God is always there, and all we do is injure our own souls when we live like He isn't.

Simply put, that is what this new set of lyrics is about.


Who I Am
 
I've closed my eyes
Tried to believe the light was not there
I've cried at night
Hoping and praying you could hear

It's such a paradox
I'm at odds with myself
Wanting you to be
But not wanting you to see
Who I am

It's always bright
Even when I write darkness on the walls
I cannot fight
Cause your whispers echo through these halls

Time is a killer
And my doubt is the knife
Doubts that you'll see me
Doubts that you need me
Doubts that you'll fix who I am

But in this moment I see
I live inconsistently
Because you always know
Who I am
And you can redefine
Who I am

Easy?

Hey All.  Here are the lyrics to my newest musical project.  It's one of the few remaining songs that I need to finish up before I can begin the quest of recording my first full-length album.

The song is simple on the surface, yet deals with some very complex problems we all face as members of humanity, churches, etc.  Jesus' statement in Matthew 7:3 has really hit home with me lately, and this is my response.  I hope you all enjoy it, but most of all learn from it.

EASY DOES IT

It's so easy

To see the dust in your eye

To see where you go wrong

To catch a glimpse of how you fail

It's so easy

It's so easy

To toss off the weight of blame

To attribute it to another name

To forget that I'm just the same

It's so easy

Maybe if I took a breather

I could look at myself

But it's not easy

It's so simple

To make claims of righteousness

To excuse myself of my foolishness

While conveniently seeing yours

It's so simple

If I could just look in the mirror

And take a look at myself

Oh, but it's not simple

I'm no different

The only difference is I can defend myself in my head

And I believe it

And it makes sense

I force the mirror to my own face

I'm terrified

And then the whisper

"I never said it would be easy"

Ignored Questions

It seems there's this whole majority of Christianity that just believes - with no clue whatsoever as to why they believe.  One could call it the cliched "blind belief".  It's unfortunate, because these are usually the people that end up facing the most difficult questions from nonbelievers.

I've set out lately to find explanations to the questions that people get hung up on concerning the Bible.  I'll admit that I've struggled with many of them before, and continue to struggle with a few.  If every Christian is honest with themself, they'll admit that there are many things about the Bible that they simply can't explain.  The fact of the matter is this: that's not the place we're supposed to be at.  I'll attempt to explain some of the questions I've had lately and the answers that I've discovered (and haven't discovered).

First off, we can establish one very important principle.  God is a God of logic and reason.  Contrary to what many people believe, the God of the Bible is not a divinity who simply expects his people to believe something that makes no sense.  Rather, since we know that everything was created by God (John 1) it follows that logic and rationality were made by Him as well.  As such, we can expect God to make sense.

The problem comes in when we read passages in the Bible that don't seem to make sense in the least.  If we are genuine moral thinkers, we will naturally have some difficulties when we run into verses like Deuteronomy 21:21, where God says that if a child is disobedient towards his parents "... all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, that he die: so shalt thou put evil away from among you; and all Israel shall hear, and fear."  Contrasting this with Psalm 145:8-9 "The Lord is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. The Lord is good to all, and His mercy is over all that He has made", one wonders how the two passages could possibly be justified.  There are countless other passages like the one above in the so-called "Mosaic Law" of Leviticus and Deuteronomy.  One continually wonders when reading them (I know I have), how could a just God say and command such things?  A logical person's faith can begin to unravel.

It is this juxtaposition of the seemingly cruel God of the Old Testament and the loving father God of the New that nonbelievers get stuck on.  And frankly, the vast majority of Christians have no clue how the two are justified, much less an answer to give to those who are struggling with this issue.  Many believers are aware of these difficulties concerning the Old Testament God, but are seemingly content to simply shove them out of the way - never addressing them.  For instance, how many times have you heard a Christian teacher speak about this issue?

Is this the kind of faith that a loving, just, and logical God would want us to have?  Would a God of reason really want His creation to only have a shell of blind belief and not the meat of earnest conviction?  I believe that we are truly doing disservice to ourselves and the people we are supposed to be reaching by ignoring these kinds of issues.  It's about time that the people of God really examine what they believe to the "t", rather than being content with the mushy gushy God of good feelings.

Anyhow, when one reads the Bible as a whole it seems that God is either extremely schizophrenic or is simply cruel and unjust.  Let's be honest with ourselves here.  This is obviously something no one would ever admit in church - that they've had such "sacrilegious" thoughts.  But for true faith to exist, we have to face the facts and address these issue.

So, let's identify the problem, laying it out in a classical Aristotelian way:

> The Old Testament God seems cruel, demanding, and unjust.
> The New Testament God seems loving, caring, and forgiving.
    > God is (at the very least) inconsistent
Simply put, this is a valid argument.  The conclusion naturally follows from the combination of the two premises. 

The question we're faced with, then, is this:

Why does God seem inconsistent?  Why does He seem cruel in the OT and kind in the NT?  How can a "just God" seem unjust at the same time?

How could a just God command the following?
Genesis 38:10
Exodus 21:7
Leviticus 20:9-10
Leviticus 21:16-23
Numbers 21:27-35
Numbers 31:17-18
Deut. 13:6-11
Deut. 14:21 
Deut. 20:11-14
Deut. 21:18-21
Deut. 23:2
Amongst many others?



These are the questions I will attempt to answer in the coming weeks.  Keep your eyes open for new posts!  Meantime, I would be extremely interested in reading your take on this problem, as I'm still struggling with it myself.  Read the verses listed above and honestly evaluate them.  Don't just skim over them as so many Christians do.

God Bless!

When Mom Came Home

"You'd better have your chores done when I get home."
~ Mom

When my sisters and I were old enough, my mother would let us stay home by ourselves while she ran errands.  This only happened once in a while, so we learned to appreciate it when it did.  We were allowed to do pretty much anything we wanted outside of leaving the premises or making a disaster.  We had some great times when this happened.  This "treat" was all on one condition, however - we were required complete our assigned chores before my mother came back.  Needless to say, she wasn't very pleased if she came home and the work hadn't been done.  When this was the case, all three of us kids got punished.

All of these times sprung up into my mind as illustrations of a parable of Christ in Matthew.  I've been thinking quite a bit about parables lately, as you've probably noticed my last post.  The stories of Christs present the profound truths of God in simple form, and in that regards they are the best stories around.

In Matthew 24:45-51, Christ presents us with an allegorical story that describes how our attitude should be towards His unexpected coming.  The whole of the chapter concerns the suddenness of His glorious appearance, and how we should be prepared at every moment for His arrival here on earth.  The parable reads:


“A faithful, sensible servant is one to whom the master can give the responsibility of managing his other household servants and feeding them. If the master returns and finds that the servant has done a good job, there will be a reward. I tell you the truth, the master will put that servant in charge of all he owns. But what if the servant is evil and thinks, ‘My master won’t be back for a while,’ and he begins beating the other servants, partying, and getting drunk? The master will return unannounced and unexpected, and he will cut the servant to pieces and assign him a place with the hypocrites. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth." (New Living Translation)


It's apparent from Christ's words that His expectations are for us to be hard at work spreading His gospel when He returns.  Just as my mother expect my and my sisters' duties to be completed when she got home from running errands, so does Christ have these same expectations of us.  If a human mother finds it unsatisfactory to return to their home and find their children having done nothing that they were supposed to, how much more will Christ find our useless "entertainment" unsatisfactory in the light of eternity?  We can be sure that if any of us are here at the time of His appearing that we will be wishing we had done more for Christ and His cause.


We can all become entangled in the "entertainment" of our society so easily.  Just as the servant in Christ's parable became caught up in the drunkenness, partying, and violence of the world, so can we fail to complete our Master's assignment to us to spread His message.  I recall from my childhood that there were many things that my sisters and  I let distract us from completing our assigned jobs, none of which were more important than keeping the house in good order.

Let's be clear.  Christ does not expect us to live lives that are no fun, lives  that are dull and filled with pious reverence.  He does not require us to live for 37 years atop a pillar, our sole activity being praying to God, as the famed Simon the Stylite did to show his devotion.  He's not unreasonable in His expectations of us.  He simply asks us to be mindful of His coming; to live in the light of His appearing.  He asks us to bring others to the saving knowledge of hope simply through getting to know them and spending time with them.  He allows us to be in the world in some ways - thought not of it.  We are, of course, to be separate from the world in that we refrain from its corrupt activities, but we are permitted to have a little fun here and there.  God does not want miserable, robot-like followers.  All He desires of us is to live life, realizing how important our mission is.

As our examples display, we should be very wary that we are not found being lax in our duties when Christ returns.  The faithful, hard-working servant will receive the blessing and thanks of the Creator of the Universe.   Let's be mindful that Christ could return today.  Even though that has become a sort of "Christian Cliche", it remains true.  We all want the reward we will receive if we are faithful to Christ's callings, but we don't want the blood, sweat, and tears that come along with that.  As Christians, we are called to eagerly await the return of our Lord, and we should all be striving to be showing effort for Him when He comes.  We'll wish we had done more.

The Incarnation of Stories

And the disciples came, and said unto him, Why speakest thou unto them in parables?

(Matthew 13:10)

Everyone loves a good metaphor.  They enable us to fully grasp concepts in ways that are plain and yet comprehensive.  They are used in speech everyday by all of us, whether we are of aware of them or not.

One of the greatest theological thinkers of the previous century, C.S. Lewis, was prolifent in metaphors.  One can hardly read a paragraph of his writings without encountering a word picture of some sort.  He realized that for human beings to understand heavenly things, they needed to have an earthly picture to equate them with.  It is through metaphors that most of Lewis’s profound ideas were presented.

It’s not simply in his philosophical works, however, that Lewis used metaphors.  His best known works, The Chronicles of Narnia, are well known for being allegories of his belief in the God of the Bible.  Allegories are simply metaphors on a grand scale – they are entire stories which give us a unique picture of a known truth.  They present to us the things we read in the scriptures daily in a new and fresh way.

When the disciples asked Jesus why he was sharing parables with the crowds that gathered to hear him speak, it wasn’t that they didn’t understand the concept of allegory.  It was common practice in those days to use word pictures - their rabbis employed them in every teaching - so they weren’t foreign to the disciples or to the groups of people Jesus was addressing.  The reason the disciples were confused was simply that they already plainly understood all of the principles Christ was trying to get across. The Lord responds to their question of why He was telling stories by saying that “…it is given unto you [the disciples] to know the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven, but to them [the crowds] it is not given.” In other words, the moment the disciples were called by Christ, they were given understanding of the “Kingdom of Heaven”, they were granted with knowledge of the principles and statutes of God that Christ came to share.  To them, the stories Christ was telling were simply rote repetitions of things they were already well aware of.  Jesus was quick to explain to them, however, how useful his allegories were in getting across his intentions to those who did not know the mysteries of the Kingdom.  He declares that they have the power to open the eyes of the blind and the ears of the deaf to His truths.

Needless to say, Jesus’ parables were incredible.  His stories were the truths of God made manifest in ordinary, colloquial human speech.  Just as Christ made himself in our image so he could relate to us personally, He used simple storytelling in simple everyday speech to relate God’s truths to us in an understandable way.  The miracle of the Incarnation is echoed in the infusion of God’s high principles into our low, debased languages.  Think about it: Christ could have come to Earth in His full splendor, but He didn’t.  He came as a weak infant in a dirty cave.  On the same token, He could have spoken His messages in the tongues of angels (which are really the only way to do God’s words justice), but He didn’t.  He presented them in the unliterary, slang-filled speech of the common man.  There was nothing majestic about either His coming or His preaching.  The Incarnation of Christ went well beyond the virgin birth into the very words He spoke.

We all enjoy stories.  Most of us spend hours viewing them on our TV’s.  Some read books as well.  We engage in these activities because stories somehow help us to connect with something outside ourselves.  The “morals” of the tales we read teach us something we may not have known, and the characters we view help us to experience things we have never experienced.  Sadly, many of the stories we tune into now days simply don’t have any meaning – there are no morals involved.  They are simply “entertainment” to pass the time. Christ’s stories were incredibly beyond this lackluster futility– they all had meaning and purpose.  Our Lord was the ultimate story-teller.  He was engaging, clear, and exciting in His tales.  Not one story that he wove was meaningless.  Through His use of parables, we all can understand the incredible depth of Heaven.

J.R.R Tolkien, the famed writer of the Lord of the Rings trilogy, was fond of saying that each of us longs to tell or experience stories simply because God loves to tell them, and we are made in His image.  Through the parables of Christ, we see this to be true.  He told spectacular stories, the likes of which will never be penned by man.  In a world where stories are rated based on how many copies they sell, the brilliance of Christ’s is staggering.  While Tolkien’s trilogy is the second best-selling book of all time (and rightly so), the Bible remains at the top of the list.  Tolkien acknowledged in many instances that God’s story of our redemption was the most profound story of all.  Christ’s parables of heavenly truths rank a close second.  The numbers - but more importantly the changed lives - prove that both these statements continue to ring true.